How's your mom and them?

How's your mom and them? A common way to greet a fellow southerner. It covers the concern you have for their mom and the whole family. Southerner understand it, yankees are confused by it... We don't really care, but it's this wierd courtesy type of thing. The common response is 'oh just fine'.....

So this morning, mother and I decide we are going to brave the crowds and go shopping on this the holiest of shopping days, Black Friday, i.e. the day after Thanksgiving... We are not those crazy women that camp out at the local Wal-Mart in order to get the $25 DVD player, we went out at about 9:00, b/c by then all of those crazy people have had to go home and take a nap...

Before the shopping commenced we stopped at the local resturant for breakfast.

Sidebar: My mother knows everyone in our hometown, or least the West end. I couldn't do anything growing up without someone calling my momma or blabbing about it at church... We can't go to the grocery or to the mall without running into someone she knows... She is the typical southern woman, she had a debutaunte season, and she is from "good people"...

We go in to the resturant and three of the employees there come running up to mother and hug her neck and say things like "we haven't seen you in a month of Sundays" ... So we spent about 30 minutes catching up on these peoples lives... I swear two other people came up to our table and started talking to her and she seemed interested and concerned about these people's lives.. What was funny was that one of these people talked with her for a good 5 minutes, he walked away and she said ' I have no idea who that was' NO LIE... It was hysterical. Instead of saying "who the hell are you?" she sat there like the good little southern lady that she is, nodded and smiled until they went away...

The quickest way to start a fight at a mall during the holidays: CUT LINE.... I almost had to break one up today.. These ladies and I are standing in line for the bathroom, I would say there were about 5 of us standing there. We're all kind of chatting about the bargains, the crowds and whatnot, it's what southern women do... We socialize at every available opportunity. Well, this woman, walks right past all of us right up to the bathroom door. The woman in front of me looked at me and said "oh no she didn't", she was ready to fight! A grown woman... I put my hand on her arm as to say "I've got this one".... I said to the woman, (i.e. the cutter) and said
"excuse maam, but the line is back here" ... She looked at me and honestly said, "I didn't know there was a line"... NO LIE... As if we were all standing there for our health... Amazing....

It's like people switch from semi intelligent to pure stupid the day after Thanksgiving... It's only going to get worse... But just remember, when you see someone you know, give em a wave and say "How's your mom and them" .... They'll know what you mean... =)